A Web-Uplifter Extra....
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Sign on Plumber's Truck:
"We repair what your husband Fixed."
Pizza shop slogan:
"7 days without pizza makes one Weak."
At a tire shop in Milwaukee:
"Invite us to your next blowout."
Door of a plastic surgeons office:
"Hello, can we pick your nose?"
Sign at the psychic's Hotline:
"Don't call us, we'll call you."
At A Laundry Shop:
"How about we refund your money, send you a new one at
no charge, close the store and have the manager shot.
Would that be satisfactory?"
At a Towing
Company:
"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want
tows."
Billboard on the side of the road:
"Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these
signs."
On an Electricians truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."
In a Nonsmoking Area:
"If we see smoking we will assume you are on fire and
take appropriate action."
On Maternity Room Door:
"Push, Push, Push."
At an Optometrists Office
"If you don't see what your looking for you've come to
the right place."
On a Taxidermist's
window:
"We really know our stuff."
In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."
On a Butchers window:
"Let me meat your needs."
On a fence:
"Salesman Welcome, Dog food is expensive."
At
a car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on
your feet - miss a car payment."
Outside a
Muffler Shop:
"No appointment Necessary, we hear you
coming."
Outside a Hotel:
"Help! We need
inn-experienced people."
On a desk in a reception room:
"We shoot every 3rd salesman , and the 2nd one just
left."
In a Veterinarians waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes, Sit ! Stay!"
At the Electric Company:
"We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill.
However, if you don't you will be."
On the door of a Computer Store:
"Out for a quick byte."
In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there and be hungry, come on in and get
fed up."
Inside a Bowling Alley:
"Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop."
In the front yard of a funeral home:
"Drive carefully, we'll wait."
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